Friday 30th January

I have still yet to learn not to leave eating until I’m absolutely starving. I really need to learn this lesson, preferably before I make myself ill by scarfing down as much as I can. Like I did today. I was so hungry by the time I’d finished making dinner that I porked out on Bolognese (not on the pasta, I actually weighed it out). Now I am suffering with monumental bloat. I keep doing this to myself.

I am so fed up of doing this to myself but the hunger pangs come on so quickly that I barely have time to make a meal before I’m completely starving and ready to scoff my way through the whole meal (my husband’s three portions too). I can go all day without feeling hunger of any kind but at soon as it hits I feel like my stomach is digesting itself. It’s fine when I’m fasting, I know I can’t eat at all (well you know), but when I know I can eat it hits really hard and I gorge.

Bizarrely on these “binge” occasions I don’t go over my TDEE at all, I just feel like I’ve gorged on a week’s calories all at once. I’m hoping this is an indication that my stomach and my appetite are shrinking and that my brain hasn’t caught up yet.

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